Life with Kids

Simple steps to doing what matters…today

by Kelly Pryde, Ph.D.

Never be too busy or too much in a hurry to connect with
the moment you are in, because that is the only time
that matters.
—IYANLA VANZANT

With the memorial of 9/11 passing us once again this month, we are reminded not only of the tragic events of that day—the lives that were lost and the families that suffered, but also of how quickly and unexpectantly our lives can change.

While each of us gets up every morning to go through another “run-of-the-mill” day, the truth is that none of us knows how much time we get. There are no guarantees. And only when we truly get that—not just intellectually, but at a deep emotional level—can we begin to approach our days in a happier and more appreciative, loving way.

As we make our way through September with all the back-to-school hecticness and scheduling mayhem, take a few quiet moments to look at the bigger picture of your life and ask yourself if it is set up in a way that you really want for you and your family. Are you engaged in things that bring you joy? Are you connecting with people in a way that you would have no regrets if things were to dramatically change tomorrow?

These are tough questions to ask … but if you don’t ask them now, then when? Don’t wait for something tragic to change the way you think about and go about your life.

Here are some thoughts to keep in mind this month. As you read them, you’ll note that they are not rocket science—sometimes we just need a little kick in the pants to remind us of their importance and a daily practice or two to keep us on track…

Lighten your load. If you have things in your life that are robbing you of your precious time and energy, get rid of them! This is not always an easy task, but you can begin taking steps to move them out of your life so you have more time for the people and things that really matter to you.

Slow down. When you catch yourself rushing and panicking to get out the door or to get something done, remind yourself that you have all the time in the world—it’s then and there, in that instant. The world will not come to a crashing halt because you are a few minutes late. Slow down and pay attention to how you’re connecting with the people around you in that moment.

Appreciate more. If you don’t begin and end each day saying thank you for the many things you have in your life—your children, your spouse, your family, the home you live in, the food in your fridge—it’s time for a new practice. You can write it in a journal, say it in a prayer, or think it in your head while you’re brushing your teeth. Whatever works for you, just be sure to say thank you often. This is a wonderful practice to develop with your children as well.

Do one thing today that matters. Focus on one thing that you have been putting off—one thing that will make a difference in your life or someone else’s. Break down whatever it is to one step that can be done today... Make a reservation for dinner with your husband. Write the opening paragraph of your novel. Sign up for a course. Forgive someone. Plan a date with your child. Write a thank you note. Go for a two-minute run. Do it today.

Laugh more. Most of the time, we take things way too seriously as adults. We can all learn and take cues from our children—to be silly, have fun and enjoy our time together. As Abraham-Hicks teaches, “Every single activity that you’re involved in is for one purpose only, and that is to give you a moment of joy.” Words to live by!